_M-LAW's DUH-

the world as i know it.

2011-12-02T16:21:00.000-08:00

This is my first blogg in way to long of a time. I got this tablet thingy now to write bloggs! My buddy ger is chatting with me while I type this. That means it is hard to respond to him and type.
Okay im gunna do a longer one soon.

HAHAHA……HAHAHAHA

2010-12-25T23:04:00.001-08:00

The Turd kings demise

once there was a magical turd, who said it herd
but a turd that had herd is preposterous indeed
with a liquid bead it told the white castle wall it didn't need
a light swim with the brown stead butt it would like a breath of air
for through this tubular hair the turd fell all naked an bear
into the care of a watery grave surrounded by a wall well behaved
all covered in smudged cloth the light entered this white cave
air rushing around and the troubled waters
made our turd think of all the hateful plotters
that pushed it out of its kingdom unaware
of turds fate in the stagnate lair!

As the swirl of liquid spun around our valiant king; holding his breath until there was a sting; flying through the depths of human kinds dejected; the turd felt quite rejected

Until the turd king found while floating, many more of his kind boating; a vast turd empire Ripe for the taking, but what is this the turd king was shaking.

If only the turd king had prepared a forward party or advanced guard, he would never have to look upon the retard; of an empire in ruins an decay, before he even knew it had existed that day.

Now in deep thought the turd sunk, not knowing that he was about to go thunk; on the bottom of a septic, in the backyard of a half crazed narcoleptic. THE END

What to say?

2010-12-25T22:34:00.001-08:00

I really haven’t been doin much other than well nothing, I get on facebook hoping some one is on, never thinking that I could just put some effort in an hang out with my friends. Well I’m changing that now, I will be more creative an outgoing. I am buying new snowboarding gear soon, and gunna get out of town for a night to watch tron in I-MAX with my friends so this should be fun.

I got a photo shoot coming up with a friends band an I hope it turns out well. I also will be investing in a new camera sometime soon, oh I am again the best man at a wedding haha I’m glad that my buddies hold me in such hi regards.

I am gunna purpose myself to get better at a lot of things that I do but not to well, like guitar, drawing/painting, better myself in my photographic ventures expand my knowledge base not bleed from the nose like literaly right now. haha wow that was random. okay so yeah I would love to start a band, I just feel the need to make music an share it I don’t know why I just got this need but hey why not.

These days have been nice because I have had a focus. Its been on my family an how to make them happy. So nice to see smiles on their faces. Now before this lovely christmass season hit I had no one to focus on, only work to take my mind off of well just life, not like I have any huge worries. Actually I’m quite care free sure I think about the future an where my place in it is, who I will marry, an how well off I will or will not be. All those aren’t really big things haha, sometimes the biggest thing in a day is why I just did what I did, or why I can’t find a sock….S-O-C-K-S HAHA oh caps lock lol.

I I me me can’t anything else come out of this mind (not mouth cause there was nothing said) ahhhh well is there any real point to these words? other than just to get stuff out, haha just don’t know anymore. okay blood has stopped.

A Toast To Bad Taste

2010-11-14T00:55:00.001-08:00

Well I wish that I really knew who I was, is it odd to ask that? Who am I really, what has my life led up to? where is it going? haha well I don’t know an maybe the answers to some of those questions won’t ever be answered or shouldn’t be.

“I know I'm not invincible, oh
Maybe I'll know myself soon”-Far-Less-

“Then ask me what it's like to have myself so figured out. I wish I knew”-Brand new-

lol just some of my inspirations for this line of thought. Honestly when I was young I used to look into the mirror an then look down at my hands, and thing that I could have been behind any other set of hands and eyes, but why here why this life? Then I just laughed at the thought because I didn’t have a choice what set of eyes I look through. The more I think about it now that I am older ( a mear 23) I start seeing that I can look through another set of eyes. Gods eyes.

I don’t think I will ever understand myself as much as I think I should, but I will keep on trying till I die an maybe before I take my last breath I will understan what this life was all about hah just the thought of it is is like trying to clime a mountain in a fog, you know which way is up an down, but you can’t see the summit. When you crest the summit its clear blue sky's an an expansive view of your whole world. Everything you knew, every place you have been to, all the opportunities that you missed or took. All that is set before your eyes an you just see all the connections of how your life led to what it is now. How the journey made you strong, how it beat you down, each an every curve ball it threw you, all the bitter moments, an all the loved cherished and pure delights in life. wow just to think about it makes me smile, feel heart ache, an yern for days long past. Though looking to the past is bitter sweet it’s the future that we live for, who we want to be not what we are. our past does not make who we are, who we are makes who we have been. hahha just some relient K for you.

who am I? after four-hundred an fourteen words I still don’t know. well just know that even if it’s a tough journey right now when you get out of this fog an look back at all that has taken place you will understand, maybe stopping for some air is what is needed. well Im not you, an maybe you understand yourself better thank I do myself an if you do then im glad for you an hope that with understanding comes wisdom an a sense of whats to come.

I love writing giberish that will never be read………mwaah love yall

What is That>

2010-09-16T22:58:00.001-07:00

Well I don’t know what this post is really about, so far its about the post….yeah

Well I have been listening to Anberlin allot lately an I have to say my favorite song is “The Haunting” and it is… The vocals are amazing an truly have a haunting sound to them. The images it invokes in my mind is of past loves an the desires an passions that went with them, and how they sometimes still haunt me.

Anberlin is a very good band an deserves respect no one should be turrenting there music go an buy it support them. They have a sound that will carry them farther than they know.

Life has been very interesting lately, I am currently out of a job but have an interview within the next week. I have some other prospects also, but I will see how they go. Work is something that is going to be fun in the next couple years, I am realizing that I need some type of job that I can support myself entirely off of. I do truly hope that I get into Boeing because that would be such a blessing, though I would be okay with going fulltime in a touring band, but that has its risks in it. It seems like my life is even more so up for grabs now than it was out of highschool.

Well I don’t have anything introspective to say other than only with nothing can one realize that everyone else has too much…….that being said I will get out of here…

Loner is as Loner does..

2010-08-25T00:59:00.000-07:00

Well here I am, I can't use windows live writer right now because my network is being a fag an not letting it connect..its been like that for a while now I think it hates me...dunno?
Anywho Im just typing this waiting for Bleach to load so I can watch some cartoons, oh an today was an awesome antisocial day :) yeah I am a loner haha an I do like having whole days where no one talks to me or is around me. I don't know exactly why I love that so much, when I love being around people too. haha but yeah I cant wait for the hike after labor-day weekend, gunna be an epic 5 day hike out in nature without social pressures, crazy noises, cops, or any of the typical. Ahh yeah I can already feel it.
I am still job searching unfortunately if life wasn't random enough; I got my first ticket for speeding so I must be doing something right haha. Well back to the first topic of lonerism; I have always been somewhat of a loner. Never here nor there, always in-between, all my "friends" have never been true. The best friendships I have made are with my cousin Chris, Jade Leek, Ger wikan, Will (can't spell his last name), Haley wilson, my sister, and as always im working on making new friends. most of the people that have been friends to me always left when there was someone "cooler" than me around, but it just taught me to just take people as they are, and not because they are cool or whatever. I kinda feel bad for people that have to be with "cool" people in order to be social, it just hurts other people when they abandon one friend for something new..
I can survive on my own, no matter how hard I want to be best friends with people I make sure to get to know them before I let my heart get involved, no use in getting hurt over someone who will just drop you when they want to. There are two people in my past that I wish I could have back as close as I did before we became "just friends" but God knows what my future holds an I will give it to him :) wow I haven't done that in a long time haha thank you God for everything that I have right now,I am truly blessed.
Some people call me shy, but im not that shy actually I just don't speak if I have nothing to say or to relate with them....when i actually do get to know people an am comfortable letting myself go they are always super surprised in how different I can be. I believe in being genuine with everyone even if it isn't what they want to hear. I love all my friend right now an thats about all I need right now is friends that will hang out and listen to me if need be... :D well ima leave now an maybe my program will work. Well here is to hoping^^

some in the works-song-

2010-08-22T09:48:00.001-07:00

What in life have we done, to deserve all we have / could it be all that fun, to have done what we’ve done / we are just like animals!

I for one will not likely be here, for this falling out / as the trees burn down, we all sing along (to this horrid song)

take take take take more, don’t forget your poor / leave it all behind, because we all are blind

Take take take take more, and be sure / leave it all alone, while we pick at bones

of what used to be, just to remind us of all the former glory / this is what is, come on an live

but we will not likely be here, for this falling in / as the fires burn, we sing along (to this horrid song)

take take take take it all, please stand don’t fall / stack it on our backs, our hearts are weak like shanty shacks

take take take take this song, to make sure nothing goes wrong

I for one will not likely be here, for this falling out!

Crazy thangs

2010-08-21T01:19:00.000-07:00

Just another post

2010-08-21T00:55:00.001-07:00

This just maybe something totally crazy, but life is starting to scare me

I wake up hoping to see the calm blackness that was before, only to be blinded by the needs and wants more

How should I go about this?

What is my motivation?

Is there someone I miss?

Have I put myself into this indignation?

Now time for that darkness to take over my mind; I welcome it, it’s never been unkind.

Well I have not been on here in pretty much forever, last time I was here there was alot going on in my life. This time is no different, except that its been really busy and also amazingly relaxing. I am trying to comprehend the here and now with my mind, but failing. Im in a definite moving on time in my life, growing out of my old life an into something else. That something else has some really big shoes to fill, but i think im ready to try walking. I love my life but wish that I could already be well “set” I just can’t stand not knowing and yet I understand that "not knowing” is how it will always be. Never want my life to be comfortable.

haha well to say much about me now would just, I don’t know do something (insert profound saying) I just fixed the flipping internet so my brain is kinda dry in the thought provoking words an my upper back is complaining….maybe i should go to bed an embrace the backside of my eyelids with a vengeance in hopes of having some epic thought or dream…maybe just maybe….yeah I will take my own advice, later..wait who am I talking to???? –Me

oh hi me how are you

-good, well you know

yes yes i do………. now who else is crazy!!!

ahhh sweet release :)

2010-05-19T13:44:00.001-07:00

why is it my heart weighs heavy on my mind, if its your heart on the line I would never leave your side, but you see I got this thing called a pride, and it gets the better of me, so much so I can not see, Im hurting you; Im on your mind too, never knew it, so I blew it. This is all just a stupid fear, none of that has happened an you are still near, at my side you stand, in mine you place your hand. I want to kiss your lips so bad right now, but your silence makes me wonder how? So far away, each an every day, my heart an mind work together to tear me apart, an you are making me fear this is only the start, of a horribly wonderful relationship that only we can make happen...

What life is/could be

2010-05-16T21:40:00.001-07:00

I would love my everyday to be spent with a woman that loves me back with every thing just like I love her, but alas I’m not in that ring yet…I love my life, but its tough an there is always drama every where. This last weekend was amazing got to go to the coast an try out surfing an did some skimboarding (thats the good part), but now the dragon called drama has popped its dumb head up.

Why is it that drama follows some people an others create it? It seams to follow me with my lovely relation ships with people. I never do anything to make it happen it just does an when it gets to me its a huge problem. Its probably a good thing that I am good at listening to the problems, but the fact is I never know who to go to just tell my problems too. I just don’t know who, well my cousin Chris clark, but he lives in Colorado. Other than Chris there is no human that I am comfortable enough to just break down in front of an show all my emotions. This makes me laugh because I am usually the one that my friends talk to if something is going on in there life that they just cant tell just anyone, and I keep there confidence by making sure its just between them an I. So why is it that I have this insecurity of trusting anyone other than God an my cousin. I always turn to God when I have a problem, because if I didn’t then I would explode in fits of rage, sorrow, all the negative mistrusting emotions we all have. I can just unload an tell him everything an after I feel better, some people don’t under stand why I would talk to a God you cant see but its better than just believing that I can handle everything(I have tried that) an having life just dump me out the back door, but its not about just feeling better its about how you let it affect you in the future. The past is over, so just get over it right?

Why is it you can’t just be friends with someone of the opposite sex anymore? We have so much meaningless expectations now days that it seems to blind us to the fact that maybe just maybe that person you claimed your own doesn’t like you like that. This is a problem that not only have I been on the receiving end (being liked an not wanting to be anything but friends with the person) an the other end (liking someone an finding out they never wanted to be anything more than friends). This is a funny topic that Im only slightly knowing in, but what I want to type about is how some one could say they are dating someone when that person is not at all interested or would I be typing about how nowadays people read too far into body language an get the wrong signals. What caused this to be how it is now? I think its because of all the loose stuff on an in the media that has raised up my generation to believe that if you act, dress, talk a certain way you can get sexual attention. Humans are so messed up, including me, in the head that we think that we are gods an can control everything with logic an Godless science. Well here is news to all of us, there are things we will never be able to explain, and why should we try we will never see the fruits of our love labor. I understand that my typing does nothing to explain what I set out to but Im working on that, and that is why hypocrisy is not so hard to do yourself yes I am guilty an I will admit it.

I am as bias as every one in the world so don’t call me a bigot unless you are ready to assume that same title, or a religious fanatic or what not because you have they same label on you its just all in how you define it right. Why do I write to this damn blog well its because no one reads it so why the hell not..!

Life is it all that we make it.

2010-01-04T15:35:00.001-08:00

Well I have been doing some thinking (like always) about life and all the crap that goes on, and since no one reads this blog I thought it would be safe to just rant like I would have if someone did read this… that is a run on sentence. First off I have been a very bipolar, tripolar, quadrapoler; you get the picture, person going in and out of emotions. Like the ocean and its tides only you cant tell when it will happen next. I am glad that I have the friends that I have but I still feel like I did in elementary school when my friends would only hangout with me when there was no one cooler, but I still got Ger and Will to hang out with cuz they got no life just like me. Well you see I am not in elementary anymore and I know that but emotions usually relate themselves to the first time you had them, unless you have a better or worse experience. I just hate it when I think that I have a friend and come to find out they couldn’t care less about me, but here I am looking at the glass half empty. ok well this last summer was what I would call the best summer in my life for sure. I got to spend like four days with my favorite girl in the world Jade ( we had been going out for five months before) in Montana then spent the rest of that week in Colorado with my cousin Chris. The most fun I have had in one week ever. After this grand experience I proceeded to find my love for skimboarding again and also jumping off of really high rocks into rivers, this coming summer I will actually go to the coast. Ger and I skimboarded pretty much everyday and we had a surprise visit from our German friend Jochien (he didn’t want to skimboard) he just hung out and laughed at us when we would fall or crash. Oh yeah and TomFest was awesome so amazing that I am pretty much going to that music fest every year for the rest of my life. After all of this shenanigans last summer did indeed make for a roaring fun one. Now day’s there isn’t much to do It rains and is cold all day, week, month and that can definitely do something to someone’s demeanor, or look on life. so this is what has come of the first part of my winter. I can’t wait for spring to come oh God I can’t wait it makes my nerves buzz with excitement. so yeah and no to life being what you make it because life sometimes brings to you opportunities and its up to you to accept or reject them, even if they seem forced on you, you will always have a say you will always have a way out of bad situation. God gave us free will to chose our own paths, sure he hopes that we would chose the options that he has set out in front of us but it doesn’t always go that way… well I am done writing stuff that has no barring on your life………...

Where has time gone?

2010-01-04T15:02:00.001-08:00

Awake and standing I stare down towards my moving feet, but how could I be moving with out willing it. my brain still confused from the backwards day before I try and pull my mind out of the fog left behind from sleep. staring at my feet and feeling them move I start to notice that I truly am not the one moving myself, for my muscles are not working. still focused on the oddity of being able to move with out actually using my legs I try to work against this motion. only to find out that I may be able to slow down but not stop myself. “ Don’t fight it and just let the buggers do their job” a gruff voice said. “ Who’s there” I yelled surprised I had not yet taken in account my surroundings, and in doing this had not noticed that I was out of the transparent forest and alot closer to the mountains than I was. “How long was I sleeping?” I asked the gruff voice of a creature that must have been behind me because I did not see anything but the narrow pathway through what must have been boulders. They seemed to be made of semi-translucent and fully translucent stones of varying color, which made the pathway turn colors as we moved. Soon there was a crossing of sorts in this immense boulder field there were seven new paths each with its own color pattern. There was more room here than in the first pathway so we stopped; well my legs stopped without my consent. “ Ok little plurips off ya go I think this one will be able to travel on his own” the voice said as it rounded to my field of vision. The creature that I saw was strange indeed; having a very translucent blue skin on a very human like form, there were some differences though. There was a clear bone like structure coming off the forearm and spine, and what looked like the remnants of a tail off of the base of the neck. After staring at her for along time and she at me I broke the silence after I saw what had been moving me. The plurips as she had called them looked like worms the same color as my skin, they must have acted like braces on my legs to keep me up while I slept. “ You can stand on your own I see” said the very interesting creature “ y-yes I guess I can, what is your name?” I said in a soft voice still startled by her. “ By name you mean what I am called, well it is Avrioletta” she stated with an almost musical quality to her voice “and what is your calling?” Well since she apparently had dropped the gruffness in her voice I could actually here the feminine in her voice. My calling, they way she put that was peculiar, “It has been awhile since I had to use my name, since I have been wandering along time” taking a breath “let me see, umm Marcus trist is what I am called” Speaking with a soft voice again I said “yes Marcus trist.” Avrioletta look at me with a questioning expression “ That is an odd thing to have more than one calling.” “how about I call you Trist, would you like that” she looked very happy with herself for giving me just one calling. “ Ok I guess that we will just go with that; I never liked Marcus anyways” I said with a smile on my face. Pleased with the results she proceeded to the nearest path, the pure blue colored one on the right of the junction. Holding something out into the light that she had gotten out of a pack she had on the ground, it started out blue like the light from the path but slowly turned black with a blood red ribbon in it. “ what is it you are doing Avrioletta?” “shhh you musnt bother one while they are in the midst of a path choosing or we may pick the wrong and dangerous path””just wait there until I am done, ok Trist” At this I proceeded to clam up until she had checked them all. first the blue, then the red, yellow, teal, gold, then green. “ ahh this is the one we shall take through the shifting light field, its the only one that the lead stone matches colors with” This place obviously had no specific path through it, so we walked on in silent observation.

Day Seven and it feels like Heaven

2009-07-12T18:07:00.001-07:00

Waking up is hard to do when the world around you feels like its moving sluggishly backwards. My mind still working on processing yesterdays events. The plant life not yielding to my weight in the meadows, and how all of a sudden someone was following me and copying my every move. Then dreams sweet numbing dreams. At that thought my eye’s snapped open and I jumped up; mistake one out of the many that I committed. Once in the air I was back on the ground, it happened so fast my mind went berserk with thoughts. How could I have moved that fast, was there anybody around me, for that mater was I a captive in a cell, but my mind settled once I saw that I was in the same dull orange treed forest I was in yesterday; Wait orange it was blue yesterday and had spars groupings of orange trees with transparent leafs. Now it has switched, unless I was just going crazy with some new drug, that might have been the reason I fell asleep so fast yesterday. At least the grass was still blue, and the mountains where still there looming in the distance. The advantage of the transparency of these trees is that I could see the mountains much better. Well ignoring the change in scenery I press on.

Towards the light behind the mountains that seems the center of this ill-gotten yet ravishingly beautiful island. As I walk on I notice that the trees are moving really slow, almost like slow-motion, also the grass was slow in receiving my foot in its unsettled grasp. After I saw this i realized that maybe just maybe they could resist my weight like a spring if they wanted to, but that didn’t account for my foot print registering slowly in the grass. Well as many theory's as I could come up with only one seemed some what cohesive; I was loosing it, like some kinda freak that couldn’t tell that he was killing people but thought they were monsters out to get him. My mind is playing tricks, and yet I continue to believe them. This branch should not be orange, but yet here it is in my hand and under my full weight but only moving downward very slowly. Even when I let go it continues to act as if I’m still there holding it. Its funny watching everything react so slowly to me kinda like I was out of the time stream, but that’s preposterous. Well time to trudge on.

As I steadily head towards the base of the mountains, still with no sign of any animals, just the plant life. I see a river of a light green colour moving, just like everything else, slowly down through the forest. Glad that I had found water to refresh me I went over to drink some. kneeling down with my cupped hands extended towards the slowly moving water hesitating just for a second then I start drinking. Only to be surprised by the flavor that hits me. The water tastes like every fruit you have ever tasted, but with even more flavors than you could label. lets just say that I drank alot of that fruity delight, and had to sit down for a couple of hours in order to be able to walk with out sloshing inside of me. After relieving myself aways away from the river I decide to follow it towards the mountains. This idea is the best one I made that day, for what was to come would utterly confuse me to the point of insanity.

The water slowly slipping by me in the slow fashion that has gone on since I started walking near it. Its really been eerily quiet down here life seems very random in showing itself in the form of animals. I have seen only a few birds that looked somewhat like parrots but their beaks split down the middle of the top beak to only circle back in a grand and perfect circle towards the top beak. Like everything else they moved very slowly and a few times i was tempted to catch one for food but couldn’t bring myself to do it. All alone now with just the water to my left and the light as my goal I meander for what seems a very extended period of time. When all of a sudden a rush of wind hits me and I fall flat on my face. It was a short but powerful gust, and after getting up and brushing the dust on me I continue. Walking the same way I was going before the wind I notice that the river is going the opposite way it was. No longer is it going down away from the mountain but it is going up and towards the mountain. I think I need a rest because everything is going backwards I can actually see my footprints before me and they disappear as I step out of them behind me. My mind is just to confused to see any logic in going some where I have already been, and so I lay down in the perfect depression of me in the grass, must have slept already…

The sixth day

2009-04-17T12:21:00.001-07:00

Diary this morning I woke up for the first time in my life. When I woke up I had a revelation of sorts. The idea came to me slowly, really slow because by the time i got the idea to form in my head it was lunch. My my where does time go…

That was the idea that took me so long to form. I have a theory about time and what happens to it, but it came with a high price…

On an island deep in the ice of Antarctica time is. It just is. It doesn’t move forward or backward, but does both and also is totally stopped. So it is, isn’t, could be, and should be, but always is. One might think that I am just talking in circles but isn’t that what we all do when we ourselves don’t fully understand an idea when first presented with one. Its funny to think that an island is in ice, but here I stand on solid ground with blue grass under foot. Ok so this is not your typical island, for it is totally encircled by ice. Down on it you would not think it was ice up there because its so high up that it just looks like the blue sky never any clouds. On top of a nicely sized knoll of blue grass and one tree that reminds me of the lorax tree from Dr.Seuss's book. It has yellow and red boughs, with a sturdy neon blue branches and trunk. While standing on this wonderful knoll I am looking down at the expansive, and vividly colored landscape. Rolling fields of blue grass and for some weird reason brown, tan, and a dark and dirty red flowers seem to take up my immediate view. Behind that a forest of these lorax like trees plus some others that I would have to be closer to to explain in any detail, but mostly the bright blue trunked lorax tree. The forest has an interestingly eerie glow to it that I would guess is derived from the trunks of the loraxish tree. Now that I think of it the only way that this place is getting any light is from the trees, plants, and something off in the distant that is almost like a sun, but never moves. Turning around to look behind me I see more fields of the reversely colored flowers, and it turns into sand dunes after only a few miles. These dunes are well as you can guess by now not normal. They pretty much look to be a mixture of well as cliché as it is to say this, all the colors of the rainbow, or better yet every spectrum of color you could imagine and more that just blow your eyes out. Now I know that there is a beach at the end of those endless miles of sand, and a sea that is the darkest blue I have ever seen, as if it were part of the depths of the ocean. Now back to the forest cause its only forward from this point not back. After the forest there is what seems to be a mountain range, but how could that even get here?…

Well with an uneasy step I set off towards the bright light, but yet the grass doesn’t bend or stir under my feet, however odd that is I press on. Walking on top of plants cause they don’t yield to my weight is an odd phenomenon to be sure, but yet it is happening no less. Now that I have a closer look at these ugly in color, but beautiful in shape flowers I realize that it may be odd for them to be brown but not so odd as to make one just write them off as not worthy of praise. No they are more beautiful than any orchid that the world could offer. They are shaped like cursive letters each peddle a unique shape and form sprouting in every direction. Now not to forget the deep red flowers that seem to be more amazing than anything yet. With a humble shape of a deep red heart they all seem to capture what simple beauty can be, but its what is at the center of the heart that captures my attention. Gems blood red in color and cut with a master diamond cutters hand. After spending some time trying to pry one out I gave up cause like everything else they were un yielding to my whims. So carefully i moved on towards the glowing forest of blue, or blue forest as I unimaginatively called it.

Once in I stared out at the bright blue emanating off of every trunk except one, and this one was a dull orange glowing trunk with transparent foliage. By now the surprise is starting to wear off, but none of the grandeur of this little Eden has worn out. Continuing down through the forest, I am sure it was down Because there was a slight decline in my forward motion hiding the mountain from my view. Each step I took is only one more to take on the return trip if I decide to go back, but what could make me want to go back. A couple of hours into my trek I felt what I thought was the wind changing direction, but it must have stopped or was blocked by the trees cause I never felt it. Further in I noticed a sound behind me like of feet hitting the ground, but i never saw anyone. So I kept on moving. The quieter I got the noise did the same. Turning around after about an hour of being followed I hoped to catch what or whom was following me “hah” I yelled out but there was nothing but a dull glow of blue. About fifteen minutes later I herd behind me “hah” and at that I jumped into a small group of trees to hide. Waiting for ten minutes I deemed it safe to leave the small group of trees, but promptly after getting out and walking a few feet the same group of trees shook and shuddered like someone had just jumped into them. I turned around so quickly that I fell over and screamed out “ ahh don’t come any closer” As soon as the words had left my mouth now were being repeated to me out of nowhere. Startled at this I also noticed the grass was soft under my weight not hard and unyielding. My mind slow with all this new information started putting together what had happened. Sleep is a funny thing it hits you when you lest expect it. Right there on the floor of the forest I slept soundly for the first time in well a long while.

Day V…

2009-04-11T00:17:00.001-07:00

I was just walking around Seattle in another boring day of my life. I spent most of the day around the Seattle science center, which is always fun to do. I love looking down from the top of the Space Needle, when you got the wind gushing through the walking area, and you think man this would be so cool if it was my house. How many time have I thought that; way to many to count. The view from the top is just breath taking, and as always i think that the EMP is one weird looking building, it looks like a huge steamer left by some giant alien dog. Just being able to live here is a dream. Well as 10:30pm rolls around I decide im late for my date with the boob tube. As I always do I have to leave by walking by that great big steamer, but from the Harrison St view. I don’t know why I leave that way; probably habit.

Let me tell you tonight was different, oh boy it was different, and some what left me speechless. Standing on the crosswalk next to the corner of 5th Ave N and Harrison St,I wait for the light to let me walk across without getting killed. Right as it shows the walking man that tells me I can go, I spot a car coming down 5th Ave way to fast, and the traffic on Harrison street is thick. So now I have come to a complete stop in the middle of the crosswalk, and my mind can’t come to grips with whats about to happen here and now. It is an abnormally Dark night tonight, and it is the first rain in two weeks so the roads are slick, why would anyone drive as fast as this one BMW. I wouldn’t know, because I certainly would not. So still standing in the road I realize I need to move, and as I run to the other side I watch the light hoping that it will turn or that the person in the BMW will stop.

Eternity is the best word to describe what I was feeling the moment I heard the tires squealing on the oil slick cement. As I am turning my body to see what is about to unfold I see the traffic from Harrison St finally realize what was going on. More and more people slamming their break pedals to try to stop before colliding into one another. Right as that was taking place the BMW made contact with another car, and I don’t remember what make, because all I could do was watch the destruction as it took its toll. At first impact the forward direction of both vehicles were severely changed to what looked more like a recoil, and spin. Until they hit again, but this time flat on both of there sides like clapping your hands, but with glass shattering, and mettle grinding against mettle. At this point I saw in the BMW the blond hair and face of a little boy just staring from the middle of the intersection, but I only saw him because the two cars had separated enough to see through the shattering glass and bits of plastic flying through the air, as they did their dance of death. I would have to guess that he had been walking on the other crosswalk when the BMW almost hit him, and he probably jumped out of the way not knowing that he had just jumped into traffic. Another collision by the two dancers closed off my view of the boy and my concern for the people in the cars, but with that collision my heart sank to a depth that I don’t think any person should feel; the windshield of the other car broke into who knows how many pieces. It was what was behind the windshield that caused this anguish, for what I now saw was more horrible than anything I have ever seen .

A face if that’s what you want to call it, but it was not a face any more. Battered and brutally bruised beyond recognition was the face of a teenage girl. Her face matted with blood had her brown hair stuck across it. I thank God that her hair was there, because I would have vomited right there on site if I had seen more. The way that collision threw her this way and that, made my mind spin and my stomach lurch but then, the devil obviously not done with this twisted moment, parted the two cars just in time for me to see that the next collision would have that boy in its grasp……

Waking up in bed with my heart doing cut-time and me screaming out no, is not the way to start out a day. Diary this entry is more about a dream i had that night, because my day was really uneventful. This dream is still haunting me as if I was really there. I have a weird hankerin for some radish.

…Who do we blame the unfortunate disasters on…

…God, the devil, or ourselves…

…There is a war out there, and it goes on every day everywhere…

The tHirD dAy- ActualLy FoUrth

2009-04-08T11:15:00.001-07:00

Well diary I seem to be missing all of yesterday, hmmm queer isn’t it.

Now for today, because yesterday is all but forgotten, well in my case it is forgotten… To start things out I woke up. At that waking I saw pretty much nothing, herd even less, and felt a cold object by my hand. Ok so this is a very weird situation that Im in when a light is flipped on. There in front of me is a stark white room, that i am seeing through a pain of glass. It seems to me now that im awake I am actually standing, wait no floating in some sort of tube. The warm water caressing my half naked body, it feels like nothing the water is the same temperature as my body so I don’t feel it. Turning to see the rest of the room that my constricted view had glimpsed, I find what I should have made note of, how I was breathing in this tube, for as it seems I had a hose that supplied me with air. Now to confound everything I had just come to know I now saw what seemed to be a human er-a humanoid of sorts. It walked across the seamless white floor, with its reflection taking the same long strides. It stood tall with a high crest on the top of its head. Long arms and legs to match, but dressed lightly in a long draping black lab coat. As it dutifully walked towards the left, the wall nearest exploded into blinding shades of reds, blues, greens, and amongst all that black. When a complex series of patterns blazed by on the wall it went white. Then the creature, that seemed to remind me of something, started to get all twitchy and turn towards me. Now I start panicking, but where do I go, with what do I defend myself if its intentions are for harm. Then I remember the object by my side. Looking down quickly all I see is a radish floating by my side, but I grab it anyways. A weapon can be any object I was once told by someone who obviously meant to do lots of harm in many different ways. As I returned my gaze to the turning creature all I saw now was its face, and deep green eye’s staring at me as I grasp my radish umm weapon. A memory nagging the back of my mind, as I look into those eyes, but it just won’t be remembered. Then as if God finally decided to let a miracle and a little grace come to me the tube opened and ejected me at the feet of the creature…

Standing on my feet half naked I look around only to find myself in my room. Most of the day spent wondering what had happened. I got a break from that tedious thought process, when Jade and I went on a hike almost up to Clear Creek falls, but as we were nearing the end of the hike a hole in the earth opened up and blackness enveloped me…

…Warm nothingness caresses my mind…

…In what order do we live our time…

…A memory nagging my mind…

…Only in time…

…The End?…

Day TwO in tHe liFE of me

2009-04-06T01:00:00.001-07:00

Well diary here i am and its not even noon yet, yet i stand or sit and type out most of the going ons of my life. This sunday was one of those blasé days, nothing interesting happened, but i will write anyways…

After going through all the strenuous activities of the morning me and my family went to church. The service was enjoyable with the women’s teen-challenge coming over to sing and give testimonies. Well that about sums up church this bright sunny Sunday in D-town. Awe, but now the day picks up a little, also it seems to hold a tint of boredom with it. On the way back from church me and my bro were just enjoying some music and a nice drive when it seems instead of the normal lull of music and high mountain peaks we usually see and hear. There was a dense and dark wood; the high tree boughs didn’t seem to let the light down to the floor, instead a dull green glow lit up the narrow trail we now stood upon with nap-sacs slung over our shoulders. Now as confused as you might think we were, and we were confused, but now it wasn’t chaos but and unearthly calm that settled over us. We could not use our rational minds to figure out where we were all we could do is look back and forth on the path to find out little more than we already knew, we were lost and lost quite good. “ so Micah” is all Caleb said to me, but all i could focus on was my surroundings. Lush shades of green rippled through the air like it was charged with an energy, but i knew this was just the wind moving the high sun soaked boughs. It seemed to me that everything was green not just the light coming from the top of this forest but the dirt and flowers of unimaginable shape and beauty that i was just now seeing. In the background caleb still blabing about something I just could not think of anything else but what I was seeing. The path was straight both in front and behind, and since the trees had no branches except for at the top you could see in all directions. Wondrous creatures on both sides of this path bounded by all with wary eyes upon the two newcomers. One of them that caught my eye had golden fur and very long and vengeful talons. Yet it walked on four slender legs and with each step reflected the ambient green light into a rainbow of sorts, but still within the spectrum of green and gold. Its back had spines slightly covered by its lying fur, and its face was the face of a sorrowful hound that had just shed a bounty of fresh tears for its prey that it had just slaughtered. A dangerously beautiful creature indeed I noted before noticing caleb was now gone. “ hey douche bag are you gunna drive or not?” yelled an impatient Caleb. “what? what!” Said I with really confused about this change in events. “umm now buddy” caleb continued. so we drove home. Upon arriving home I decided to go and call Ger to well tell him about my little day dream, and get him over to hang out, and perhaps we might turn it into a video.

After a good few hours of playing many types of basketball Ger and I decided to take a trip down to the river to cool off. Decidedly this was a great decision for as it were the rest of the day had been a bore. The water was fresh and cold a nice and bitter reminder that life is always moving and refreshing anew the experiences that we face. So after the both of us had thoroughly drenched our heads we decided to follow the river upstream. A decision worth taking back, for when an hour had elapsed we met a king and didn’t forgot where we were. There he sat in his sticker bush throne holding his deep purple radish staff. Watching us standing drenched from head to toe in a icy realization that we were not where we ought to have been, and yet there was the river flowing through his great hall. A dark green glow surrounding us with its intoxicating waves of different shades and hue’s. “Do you remember” the kings voice thundered through my mind like a million explosions. Now the realization hit me. “The green forest, but I thought it was just in my imagination?” I said more to myself than to anyone “ Ger do you see this?” Ger just looked around in stunned astonishment and managed to say “where in the world are we, I mean I know we followed the river, but this looks nothing like Washington!” then the king turned his attention to Ger “why do you doubt that all this is what it is, nay it is not Washington but I call it lothniel my kingdom.” with that said he turned to address us both “ you have been chosen to help free my kingdom from an affliction that is not easily overcome, but you have to save it cause there is no one else left in my kingdom to attempt this” “what is required for this task to be completed my king” I ask for a better understanding. With a smile he sits back down on his thrown and for an instance one short period of time try's in vain to answer me but is over taken by the bush his throne is made of. Dumbfounded I try to make sense of what was just told to me, but alas I can not. looking towards Ger, but seeing that he is in the same predicament as I. “so Ger what do you want to do about this? should we save this kings kingdom or our own hides?” I say to try to lighten up the mood a little. “ well Micah I think that we need to first find our way out of this throne room before we too turn into vines and bush.” states Ger matter-of-factly. Smiling at our humor we proceed to what seems the nearest exit. It is but a dark hole in the side of an unending sticker bush wall, yet it is big enough for two grown men to fit through at the same time. “shall we leave” I ask Ger. With a nod we both step into it and are equally greeted by a nice splash and the feeling of water surrounding us. The Sauk river is a fast moving one but bless God we landed in a slow moving pool near the shore. “wholly shit what just happened” yelped Ger gasping for air as we make for the shore to dry off in the Washington sun. “well Ger I am just as clueless as you are to the Whole matter.”

Yes i know that is hard to believe, but to me it now feels all to real. Oh yeah we did get home and proceeded to play video games and eat junk food, and maybe to get the memory out of our heads… The Green Forest awaits……

A day in the Life of Me

2009-04-05T00:12:00.001-07:00

Dear diary:

Today was an interesting day. Well at least it was for me. when i woke up this morning i saw a glimpse of my ceiling, and you might say that is nothing worth reading about; but wait don’t leave I have more to tell. In this glimpse I saw a radish and a lone wanderer. The Lone-Wanderer was standing in a field of butter cups covered slightly by a mysterious dust that shimmered shades of purple, gray, and aquamarine. In the Lone-Wanderer’s left hand was a radish with the most exquisite royal purple color. “hmm” the Lone-Wanderer said as he stared at the field from his perch on the only bamboolts tree there. “hmm” said the Lone-Wanderer in a slightly higher tone. “this field seems to have very good sound qualities.” the Lone-Wanderer said and he moved on towards the surrounding forest of Gawdnish Thistles, and all the while ignoring the blinding light the dust made when was wafted up by passing through, it combined and exploded burning all of the butter cups. Now though you might think that peculiar that The Lone-Wanderer not notice an explosion; well you would be right in thinking that. In the forest of Gaudnish Thistles the Lone-Wanderer with radish in left hand found what seemed to be a game trail that had recently been torn asunder, probably by a stampede of whatever lived in this forest. With that thought going through our Lone-Wanderer’s mind, and it occurred to the Lone-Wanderer that it would be a good idea to follow this stampedes trail. Further down and still holding the radish that was all the colors of the rainbow our Lone-Wanderer was growing weary of this burden and so sat down on a dry river bed with a babbling brook beside it…… now I say that this was an odd thing indeed to see on my ceiling but what can I say about that, but weird things happen. The next intriguing thing that happened today was around lunch time I went out for my regular walk of the day and was surprised to see someone was following my every foot fall. So I pretended to not notice and trudged on, when I felt a hand upon my back, surprised as I was I could not let on that the tremor in my body was because of this very hand. When i turned around I saw my Brother Josh smiling his cheeky smile, and with a deep sigh i let my shoulders relax and said “ holy canoly boy why did ya do that to me; being all sneaky and such.” “ Hehe” he laughed before speaking “ i just wanted to try out my new ninja skills on you.” “ well you certainly are not a rookie I will give you credit for that.” said I with a brotherly love kind of voice. “ lets get back home before you decide to kill something with your mind” I said while starting the short trek home, with Josh just behind me smiling from ear to ear.

There see diary how life can be interesting. Well most of life can that's for sure, because once i went to work all things interesting stopped and the mundane took over. You do not want me to tell you about that. It is time for bed and a good book, or is it the other way around hmm oh well i will be back tomorrow with hopefully something interesting…

the unconstitutional skews of what is constitutional-maybe i am just naive about this?

2009-02-21T23:10:00.001-08:00

threw the last couple of years i have been realizing that America has become a socialist country we have less and less constitutional rights than we should. like why is it that it is discrimination when a Christian talks in a public place about the backwardness of homosexuality but it is not discrimination for the homosexual to do the same thing to the Christian. isn't it racism if a black person calls a white man white trash or cracker; it is but i don't see any news about the law doing anything to stop that. I just don't seem to see the government having any backbone to stop hate crimes against Christians, and whites. also the whole Separation of Church and State has been totally screwed up it is meant to keep the church from taking over the government and vise versa because if that happened we would have another crusade on our hands. Thats not what America was made for. freedom of religion(even though the Church is under constant attack) is why the pilgrims came not to replicate the monarchy that tried to kill them off. and no i am not over-reacting to what i have seen, heard, read and experienced.

Just an –untitled- poem i made

2009-02-21T23:08:00.001-08:00

life and all its twists go unnoticed until all you have is life; but why shouldn't you have it-
is it really all that it never was; up till now life has just passed by, and still a hole, a pit-
cliché isn't the way that all of this plays out; but you oh you are not-
expecting little and getting to much; has left me, but with one shot-
here standing among the throngs, and looking in; crowds are no place to hide-
summer showers comfort one so used to cold, and this lovely day; makes one want to see inside-
searching ever inward to find this covenant so unfulfilled; hear the knock and heed-
could it be? will it not go on to say that when you tried, found out that you where not meant to bleed-
three trees, seven lamps, and one; whom do you follow-
it was me, it was me! that put this fate on you; now a heart not so hollow-
here i stand beckoning you with open arms; looking you in the face-
calling, oh the uttering in my soul; makes me scream oh grace oh grace!-
how far you have come; only shows how far you will go-
i know that its me whom holds back; but i let go, and let you ebb and flow-
-to be continued-